Mourning

It is a beautiful spring day.
The birds are singing, the sun is bright, the air is crisp.
The shadows of the branches make a mixed up pattern on the window shades.
The shadows of the leaves dance on the green tile floor.
I sit here and wonder how to mourn on such a gorgeous day.

My cousin Mark, the one who went under Hospice care two weeks ago, died yesterday. He survived two weeks of the potential two month period that he had left to live. Though he suffered for five years, he and his family have now been given a blessing of having to suffer no more. Alyssa seems to think that he has been taken away to become someone's guardian angel. Perhaps that is true...will we ever know?

I am truly thankful and glad to know that Mark's last two weeks weren't at all bad. He was constantly, daily, surrounded by family and friends, by loved ones. He didn't talk much, but he enjoyed tapping his feet to the music on his iPod. He was entertained by our miniature-sized cousins dancing around the room and flying kites outside the window. He got to eat whatever the hell he wanted - chocolate, cookies, macaroni and cheese, you name it! He was spoiled and deserved every moment. The best part was definitely the daily doses of love that he received from his visitors. I heard that his former roommate from San Francisco flew out to see him, as well as his friends from CT.

The funeral is on Sunday, time to be determined. I look forward to hugging all of my family and celebrating the good life that has recently left us. Mark was always positive, putting on a smile and never seeming to let life get him down. He has been an inspiration to all...but most recently, to cousin Mary, who was diagnosed with breast cancer about a month ago. She is to begin chemotherapy next month. I wish the best for her, and I know that Mark may possibly be the guardian angel who sits on her shoulder and tells her that life is going to be alright.

This one's for you Mark - I love you and I am sure going to miss you.